Last weekend I found moments of opportunity to spend time in my studio with a bouquet of flowers. Everything about the bouquet was inspiring me. The sunflowers were a beautiful golden yellow and all the other flowers fell into shades of burgundy, deep pink and purple. The feeling of Autumn sat in a glass vase staring at me.
As I worked my way through exploring the blooms as one piece to individuals, I found myself taking the entire bouquet apart and laying them on the table side by side. A composition came together with the golden sunflowers taking center stage and the darker stems filling in around them. The light coming through the window was skimming over the top to create a truly striking scene. Before I knew it, I had over 100 images taken.
As I sat at my computer going through them and starting to edit the mood I wanted, the excitement in me grew and grew. First I show my daughter who is also an artist, she has an amazing drawing talent. “That’s cool, mom.” Then I show my husband who has no art ability. “What is it?” Then I post on Substack with quite a heartfelt and vulnerable text. I needed to share how it was making me feel as I was in this moment of pure joy and excitement. I also shared on Facebook and Instagram which always disappoints.
I really wanted someone else to feel as excited as I was.
Then the reminder I had to tell myself … no one will love your art as much as you do.
I don’t say that with anger or to be mean to myself. I say it with love. It’s to remember that the way I feel about my work no one else will truly feel that same way. They may see something beautiful and like it but they are not as connected as I am with it. There are emotions and circumstances that are going into the moment of creativity. I can explain that to someone all day long but when they look at these images it’s just pretty flowers to them.
When I seek validation of something that I’m really excited about but the reaction from others isn’t what I was hoping for, I can get really discouraged. I must remember that no one is going to love it the same as I do. At then end of the day, I truly do have to make art for myself and as weird as it might sound, I must be my biggest fan. Because then who am I really making art for? Just to be liked by others or to be loved by me?
As my biggest fan, I wanted a print to display what I was excited about. I settled on my favorite-of-the-moment image (the 2nd image in this article) and made an 11×14 print. I decided to hang it in a little hallway outside my husband’s office where I could see it from our kitchen and family room. It added a wonderful pop of color in the space and I’ve seen my husband look at it as he walks through which makes me happy.
It’s good to remember to make art that makes you happy and to be your biggest fan.
B.
If you are interested in checking out my Print Shop, please click here.
Leave a Reply